They took my grandmother away from me today.
The cold and dirty thing is, I was told that I was taking her to a Dr. appointment for a checkup. She wouldn't go unless I took her, and she was court appointed to do this. I convinced her to go and that I would take her because I didn't want DHR coming and forcing her to do something that she didn't want to.
Well, I get there and I realize how strange it is that they're seeing her in the ER. They do blood work, take vitals, the usual stuff. Well, the doctor then came in and told her that she had a UTI but they would give her something after admission. ...what?! I told him that there must have been a mix up because she was only there for a check up. He steps out, and an hour later a lady comes down and introduces herself, and when I ask what's going on, she says that she can't tell me anything...wtf. So yeah, they wheel my grandmother off to the floor of old people with dementia and alzheimer's, and force me to stay away.
I can hear her screaming for me on the other side of locked doors, but there's not a damn thing I can so. When a nurse came out, she assured me that I would get to see her before I left, but they were trying to get her settled in and ask her some questions. The crying and begging never stops and I can hear it from where I'm being forced to set, alone to deal with this by myself. Thanks a lot, family.
Another hour ticks by, my grandfather and mom finally arrive. few moments later, the nurse comes out the let them in so they can answer questions. So another 30 minutes by myself, wanting nothing more to jump out the window to make it all stop because I feel as if I've betrayed her. I was the one that took her up there.
Finally I'm allowed back, and I have to deal with explaining to her that she can't go home tonight. She thinks she will be coming home tomorrow, but it may never happen.
That's bad enough, but after we leave, my grandfather explains to me that the case worker is restricting visitations. Only my Grandfather and 'uncle' (the asshole that's fighting for guardianship) are allowed to see her until after the hearing on Wednesday.
I'm suffocating. I don't think my heart can break anymore. This is the worst feeling ever. Knowing that she needs me, is crying and begging for me, but they won't let me near her. They're afraid that I'm going to load her up and leave the State.
My nightmares are becoming reality.
Needless to say, I haven't slept. This is day #4. But there's no way I can rest now. My mind is going a million miles a second. I know I should take time away from the forum, but honestly.. you guys are the people I feel closest to, and right now.. I don't need to be alone. Yeah, I know.. the chat isn't like being around actual people, but it's all I've got.
So yeah. That's what I'm going through right now. I will most likely be in chat, just not sure how chatty I will be. I just need to be 'close' to someone. The house is empty right now and I feel like I'm suffocating.
